Decisions aren’t always easy or obvious. In fact, some unmade decisions haunt us on a daily basis, keeping us in a state of indecisiveness that distracts us from living our lives. This is especially true in difficult relationships where there are many dynamics and issues that have to be considered, and we are frequently uncertain and confused.

What is the solution? Decide not to decide. Give yourself permission not to make a decision for a certain amount of time. Then stop thinking about it. More facts will come to light in the interim, and you will have a different perspective. Trust that when the time is right, you will have clarity and know what to do.

If you can’t say yes, the answer is no. That’s right. Saying no often continues the status quo. Saying yes often involves making a change that requires a commitment to action. You can’t make changes when you aren’t sure. So until you are sure you want to do something different, keep doing the same thing. Don’t end a marriage, ask a child to move out, sever a relationship, quit a job, or anything else that involves change, until you know what you need to do. And don’t torture yourself in the meantime. Until you can say yes and mean it, the answer is no. You don’t have to struggle with it continually.

Some decisions have deadlines beyond your control, so you will have to make a decision with the information you have at the time. Your decisions won’t be perfect, and hindsight will always shed a different light on the past. In the case of deadlines, make the best decision you can using the knowledge, guidance, and insight you have at the time. God promises to direct your paths in spite of what your decisions are, and you can rest in this promise.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Help me make decisions when my mind is clear and I am ready to decide. In the meantime, help me know when I am not ready and give me the ability to put the decision aside until I am. Keep your promise to guide my decisions and direct my paths.

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Identify a decision you need to make.
• Decide if you are ready to decide.
• If you aren’t, give yourself a time period to not decide.
• If you are, gather the facts to make your decision.
• Submit your decision to the Lord.

Scripture Meditation

 
Matthew 5:7a

“Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’” (NIV).

Proverbs 19:21

“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails” (NIV).

Ecclesiastes 5:5

“It is better not to vow than to make a vow and not fulfill it” (NIV).

Decisions are under the sovereign will of God. Make them purposefully and carefully and then surrender them to the Lord.