If you are in a relationship, you have stress. If you are in a difficult relationship, you have even more stress. You know stress isn’t good for you, but you probably believe that there isn’t much you can do because the stress is related to what the other person is doing, and you haven’t been able to change the other person. The good news is that there are things you can do for your stress that have nothing to do with the other person.

Here are things you can do to decrease relationship stress:

• Accept the things you cannot change about the other person.
• Stop reacting to the things the other person is doing that bother you.
• Stop arguing by not answering or answering with a short answer such as “ok,” “maybe,” “no,” “could be,” “hmmm,” or “thanks for letting me know how you feel.”
• Stop pushing anyone except yourself.
• Find ways to be happy and fulfilled outside the relationship.
• Lower your expectations by learning to expect what is reasonable for that person.
• Let the person be responsible for his/her own life.
• Stop getting involved in problems that aren’t yours to solve.
• Work on setting boundaries.
• If you aren’t ready to make a decision, accept that you aren’t ready.
• Trust that you will know what you need to know at the right time.
• Turn the person over to God, who loves and cares more than you and can work in the person’s heart in ways you cannot.

These are just some of the things you can do that will significantly decrease relationship stress. All of them involve YOU changing your attitudes, your actions, and your reactions.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Give me insight into what I am doing that makes my difficult relationships even more difficult. Help me change myself to make my relationships less stressful for me.

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Identify the things you are doing that make your relationships more stressful for you and purpose to change them.

Scripture Meditation

 
Philippians 4:5-9

“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me–put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” (NIV)