Viktor Frankl spent his years in a Nazi concentration camp observing the psychological states of himself and his fellow prisoners. Being a psychiatrist, he naturally wondered what made the difference in one’s survival or death. He concluded that it wasn’t body strength; it was attitude. He stated, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way” (Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning, 1959, Simon and Schuster, pg. 86).

Even in the worst possible conditions, a person can live with dignity by choosing how he/she wants to respond. This is an incredibly powerful truth that has huge implications for our lives and relationships. Most of us are living with at least some things we find unacceptable, and when we view ourselves as being stuck and trapped, we feel angry, frustrated, undignified, and victimized.

You may be in a marriage that is painful and empty, but you have decided to stay for your children or because you believe God wants you to be faithful to your vows. You may have left a marriage because you couldn’t stay because of what was going on, even when you didn’t want to be divorced. You may be taking care of an elderly parent that is difficult to deal with. You may be suffering the consequences of bad decisions by someone close to you, and hate the unfairness of the consequences falling on you, but you are choosing to forgive.

It may seem that these choices are “right” and “expected.” You take care of a sick parent. You try to stay in a marriage through difficult times rather than leave at the first sign of problems. You sacrifice for your children. You forgive as a Christian. But we need to recognize that even when we do the right thing, we are still using our power to choose. We could make the other choice. You could abandon your parent. You could neglect your children’s needs. You could ignore your vows and give up quickly on your marriage. You could do what makes you happy without caring about others. You could be bitter. You could tolerate unacceptable things out of a fear of being alone. Some people do these things.

We need to feel empowered about our choices even when it is obvious that we, being who we are, would not make the other choice. Since there is always a choice to not do the right thing, when you choose to do what is right, feel good about it. Don’t let the fact that you chose what is right be taken away from you. Celebrate your freedom to choose. There is meaning and purpose in doing the right thing, even when it involves suffering and sacrifice.

This is a subtle but powerful truth. You don’t have to be a victim, even in the worst situation. You can celebrate your right to choose your behavior, even when it is obviously the right choice, and even if it only involves choosing your attitude.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Help me to recognize my decision to do what is right as a choice that I can feel good about. Give me the wisdom to know what is the right behavior and attitude in response to my circumstances .

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Identify the areas in your life that you feel stuck and trapped.
• Identify all your choices.
• Identify which choice you believe is “right” for you.
• Embrace that choice and feel empowered.

Scripture Meditation

 
1 Peter 2:20

“But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God” (NIV).