Wanting to be well. There was a disabled man lying near the Pool of Bethesda. Jesus asked him an important question: “Do you want to get well?”  The man didn’t know who Jesus was and didn’t recognize his power to heal him. Focused on the only solution he knew, he told Jesus that he had been trying to get into the waters believed to be able to cure him, but had thus far been unable to do so. Jesus directed him to “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” The man wanted to be well; he just didn’t know how to do it.

It might seem like an unnecessary question for Jesus to ask, but it isn’t. People have to want to get well and be willing to do what it takes to get well. The sad reality is that many do not. This is difficult to accept if you are someone who is doing everything you can to be mentally, physically, spiritually, and relationally well. Here are some reasons people don’t want to get well:

• There is a payoff for staying the way they are.
• They suffer from a mental or emotional illness that prevents them from being able to look at themselves honestly and see their faults.
• They want to blame others because it is easier than to accept personal responsibility.
• They are unwilling to do what it takes to get well.

If you care deeply about people who are unhealthy, you want to help. When you try by offering solutions, insights, truth, and hope, and the person doesn’t respond, you may try harder. If people you are close to don’t want to grow and you do, you may even feel guilty about pursuing your own healing while leaving them behind.

It isn’t wrong to move forward while others stay the same. It isn’t wrong to stop pushing people to get healthy when they don’t want to. It is okay to take care of yourself and it is okay to let go and allow others to choose whether or not they are wanting to be well. In addition, the person closest to someone is often not the best person to help. The most loving thing you can do is to back off and focus on your own healing.

By Karla Downing

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,

Give me a desire to do whatever it takes to be healthy, spiritually, mentally, physically, and relationally. Help me to give other people the room to make their own choices about getting well.

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Do you want to be well emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and relationally?
• Are you willing to do whatever it takes?
• Are you willing to let others take care of their own emotional, spiritual, mental and relational growth by letting go?

Scripture Meditation

 
John 5:1-9

Afterward Jesus returned to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish holy days. Inside the city, near the Sheep Gate, was the pool of Bethesda, with five covered porches. Crowds of sick people—blind, lame, or paralyzed—lay on the porches. One of the men lying there had been sick for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, “Would you like to get well?” “I can’t, sir,” the sick man said, “for I have no one to put me into the pool when the water bubbles up. Someone else always gets there ahead of me.” Jesus told him, “Stand up, pick up your mat, and walk!” Instantly, the man was healed! (New Living Translation)