Christians in difficult relationships struggle with how to handle the many complex dilemmas. There are common misunderstandings regarding what the Bible teaches about relationships that cause even more confusion and pain.

The following questions are some examples of the types of problems and conflicts that arise:

• Does God care? Is he punishing the person for their wrong choices?
• Should a wife submit to an ungodly husband no matter what he asks? Can she say no?
• How does a wife show respect to a husband or a husband love a wife that is doing things that are unacceptable, wrong, or harmful? Does it mean tolerance and approval? Can a spouse set a boundary if it doesn’t feel respectful or loving to the spouse?
• How does an adult child honor parents when they do dysfunctional things that lead to disrespecting and disapproving them?
• What is a parent’s responsibility to adult children in God’s eyes? What about the grandchildren?
• Does Christian love mean a person always has to put others first? When is it okay to put one’s own needs ahead of the needs of others?
• Is it okay to so no?
• Does love equal tolerance and passivity?
• Does love mean a person should step in to prevent someone from suffering the consequences of their actions?
• Does a person always have to turn the other cheek and go the extra mile like Jesus taught in the Beatitudes, meaning keep giving and overlooking whatever someone does?
• If love never gives up, always perseveres, and always hopes, can a person leave a marriage or cut-off a relationship with a destructive family member or friend?
• Does forgiveness mean a person has to reconcile?
• Is it necessary to forget in order to forgive?
• Does having a gentle and quiet spirit mean a wife cannot speak the truth about anything to her husband?
• Do Christians have rights? Can people ask for and expect respect from others?
• Shouldn’t Christians tolerate mistreatment as part of their suffering for Christ and the gospel?
• Aren’t Christians supposed to die to self?
• What about divorce, separation, and remarriage?
• Does a wife submit to her husband instead of doing what she thinks is right for her child? Can a wife put a child before a spouse?
• How does a person take care of themselves if by doing so, the other person thinks it is selfish and abandoning?
• How does a person recognize the truth about the spouse and have boundaries but still keep the heart open to to the spouse?
• How does a Christian deal with all the “negative” feelings toward a difficult family member? Are the feelings sin?

As you can see, Christians not only have to do what is right for themselves, they have to consider what the Bible teaches and what God wants them to do. This is even more difficult when they aren’t sure what God wants and have misconceptions about it.