Christian Relationship Devotional: Emotional Intelligence
I arrived ten minutes late to gym class, which I usually do. I quietly asked a man near the back if he could move over a little so I could put my mat down. He was obviously annoyed and said, “Why don’t you come on time for a change.” Apparently, my habitual late arrival was noticed. I said nothing, taken back a bit by his comment. Then my mind started to churn. “What business is it of his if I am late?” “How does he know why I am late?” “What a rude jerk!” Then I started to think creatively of lies to make him feel bad: I take an early lunch from work and barely make it there and back in an hour; I babysit every Friday for my daughter; I am a caregiver for my sick mother and can only slip out after someone comes to relieve me. The list goes on. I then watched him in class and noticed he wasn’t as limber as I was and that gave me a certain satisfaction. I could be sarcastic back and tell him to mind his own business. I honestly had thought that morning that I would change and make an effort to be on time, but then I thought, “I can’t be on time next week or he will think his comment is what changed me, and I will not give him the satisfaction!”
This all went through my mind—for awhile—yet I didn’t say anything to him because it wasn’t necessary. I didn’t owe him an explanation. It wasn’t his business. He was rude; however, from his perspective, I was rude because I interrupted his class and he let me know.
It takes emotional intelligence to respond well to situations. Here is what is involved in controlling your emotions:
- You recognize what you are feeling.
- You recognize what others are feeling.
- You detach from the situation to make an objective determination.
- You decide what the right choice is for you in the situation—one that is pleasing to God and good for you.
- You utilize self-control with God’s help to act on your decision—not your emotions.
This situation was fairly easy for me to use my emotional intelligence because this person’s opinion really doesn’t matter to me. It is definitely harder when my emotions are related to things people that are closer to me have done, but it is still my goal to react in an emotionally intelligent way.
By Karla Downing
Relationship Devotional Prayer
God,
Give me emotional intelligence through the power of your Holy Spirit.
Relationship Devotional Challenge
- Instead of reacting to your feelings, be emotionally wise.
Scripture Meditation
Proverbs 17:27
“A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered” (NIV).