I’ve got a magnet on my file cabinet that says, “Let Go or Be Dragged.” A woman in my class shared a visual picture of what this looks like to her. It is being dragged through the dirt behind a horse while holding onto the rope and refusing to let go. No matter how much you want the horse to go in a different direction, you have no way to persuade him. He has the right and ability to decide where he wants to go, and you are going with him.

The application of this saying to your life and mine is something we continually need to be reminded of: We are powerless over people, places, and things. We don’t like that. We want things to be the way we want them. Instead of accepting the things we cannot change, we try to control them. And when it doesn’t work, we just try harder and harder and harder even though we are being dragged.

In the meantime, we experience backlash from the people we are trying to control because they resent it. They have the right to make choices for themselves and even when they are wrong, they want to exercise that right.

We can love people, but we can’t control people—not even when we know our way is right and theirs is wrong. If we could, we could protect them. But we can’t make them accept our help. The best thing that we can do is to let go and let them figure things out by learning from their own experiences and consequences.

When we are being dragged around tethered to another person’s life by our focus on changing them, we aren’t taking care of our own lives. We are neglecting our needs and responsibilities, and our lives begin to fall apart—our jobs, our physical health, our relationships, our emotions, and our serenity.

This is the time that we are aware of the choice to let go or be dragged.

• Let go by recognizing that you are being dragged.
• Let go because you are tired of being dragged.
• Let go by accepting your powerlessness.
• Let go by focusing on your own life.

 
I’m tired of being dragged. I’m letting go. How about you?
 

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,
 
Open my eyes to see the mess of my own life while I have been dragged around by my focus on other people’s lives.
 

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Think about the person you are trying to change.
• Identify how you are trying to force change.
• Recognize the mess in your own life.
• Let go.

Scripture Meditation

 
Proverbs 13:3

Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin (NIV).

When you feel compelled to explain and convince others about what they need to change, it will backfire on you.

Proverbs 16:25

There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death (NIV).

It appears right to try to direct your loved one toward the right way, but it will lead to the death of sanity, order, self-care, and your ability to fulfill your responsibilities.