I have written about acceptance before. It is part of the well-known Serenity Prayer and the final step in the grief process. We find it in the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous and in other twelve-step programs. It’s also a concept found in the Bible.

Psychologist Marsha Linehan introduced the idea of radical acceptance. It centers around the idea of completely letting go of the illusion of control and instead simply embracing things as they are in that moment. We frequently hear it mentioned, so I thought I would take the opportunity to write about it.

Acceptance is the act of taking what someone offers. It’s radical when it’s the extreme opposite of what we would usually do. Instead of accepting, we usually resist the things we don’t like and try to change or control them, wasting emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental energy.

Radical acceptance involves:

• Embracing reality as it is.
• Not passing judgment on what is happening.
• Not reacting to what is happening.
• Observing without strong emotion.
• Choosing how to respond.
• Staying in the moment.
• Refusing to ruminate over the past.
• Moving forward.

 
Radical acceptance recognizes that we can’t do anything to change the way things are at that moment except by radically accepting them completely as they are, without hesitation.

This does not mean you passively tolerate mistreatment or don’t decide how to respond. It simply means you don’t waste any time trying to change the way things are at that moment. Once you embrace how things are, you can then make non-reactive decisions on what to do about it, if anything.

When something happens that you don’t like and don’t want, don’t push against it. Instead, acknowledge that it is and embrace it fully. You’ll feel peace that you wouldn’t have had without practicing radical acceptance.
 

Relationship Devotional Prayer

 
God,
 
Help me to radically accept the upsetting things that come into my life instead of refusing to admit that they are mine to deal with. Show me how much peace I can have instead of the turmoil I create when I don’t accept them.
 

Relationship Devotional Challenge

• Think of something in your life that you don’t like.
• Radically accept it for what it is in this moment.
• Pay attention to the release of tension and the peace that replaces it.
• Purpose to practice radical acceptance.

Scripture Meditation

 
Matthew 10:11–14

Whatever town or village you enter, search there for some worthy person and stay at their house until you leave. As you enter the home, give it your greeting. If the home is deserving, let your peace rest on it; if it is not, let your peace return to you. If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet.

Jesus is saying not to waste time over someone’s rejection. Instead, he wants us to move on to someone who welcomes us and our words.

Philippians 4:11–13

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.